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“Benign Boundary Violations” by Duncan Sabien

LessWrong (Curated)

Audio version of the posts shared in the LessWrong Curated newsletter.




Recently, my friend Eric asked me what sorts of things I wanted to have happen at my bachelor party.

I said (among other things) that I'd really enjoy some benign boundary violations.

Eric went ????

Subsequently: an essay.

We use the word "boundary" to mean at least two things, when we're discussing people's personal boundaries.

The first is their actual self-defined boundary—the line that they would draw, if they had perfect introspective access, which marks the transition point from "this is okay" to "this is no longer okay."

Different people have different boundaries: